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~thoughts, music, and other stuff from ryan conrad~

Traffic Venting

Filed under: Stuff, Opinion — Ryan Conrad at 3:49 pm on Friday, May 16, 2008

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Why don’t people go when they’re in the middle of the intersection after a green arrow has moved to yellow, or even gone away for that matter? Don’t they know that the green arrow is a free turn and that even thought the arrow is gone, they still get to yield to oncoming traffic and then go when it’s clear!

Also, why aren’t all stop sign intersections the same? In my opinion to have a stop sign for two people at an intersection is best. Whoever invented the horrible four way stop? Now, accidents commonly happen because people get used to four way stops or used to two way stops. Instead of just knowing I have to stop, I have to think about whether I should go or not and if and when that car is going to stop that’s coming at me. I’m looking for the back side of other stop signs. Ridiculous! Pick one kind of stop and stick with it!

Also, please don’t slow down to merge!

All Puzzled Out

Filed under: Stuff, Faith — Ryan Conrad at 12:12 pm on Thursday, May 15, 2008

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The sign read; “confused about the puzzle of God, come here next Sunday and we’ll help.” Interesting, because I’m not sure how much help they’re being by puzzling the gospel; well intentioned I’m sure. The magazines “Time” and “Newsweek” commonly hook readers by their puzzling remarks about the “spiritual” dimension and common titles I’ve seen are: “unlocking the mysteries of Chritianity and Jesus” and “What is the Bible really saying.” usually those titles are sold out quickly.

Lets slow the empirical wagon down for a second. What if it isn’t such a mystery? What if the God of the Universe really wants to give us knowledge of Himself? What if “Himself” isn’t in the form of some puzzle or stone tablet? What if it isn’t all about figuring out the codes and signs and ancient text? What if it doesn’t matter what your interpretation of certain texts are?

What if the God of the Universe isn’t out to trick us?

Wake up sleepy Church, we live in the apostolic age! He’s already given us more than we need. The only people tricked are the ones putting spooky signs in front of their Churches and attention getting headlines in their magazines. Sounds like numbers and money still have too much control over many of our brothers and sisters. The gospel isn’t confusing, lets stop burying people with the weight of non-essentials, and start living like the apostles expected we would; by the understanding that Jesus has already come. How about a closer look at the life of Jesus, because to know Jesus is to know God.

Jesus; Lets start there; for the love of God lets please start there!

Stop the added weight and trickery, God isn’t a puzzle to be solved, He’s already solved the puzzle. He’s a lover who wants to know us, not trick us.

Indiana Jones

Filed under: Stuff — Ryan Conrad at 6:36 am on Sunday, May 11, 2008

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I remember Paul Bennett and I running through his woods when we were kids pretending we had forbidden treasures, just like “Raiders of the Lost Ark” or “Temple of Doom.” I remember making weapons and forts deep in the woods behind his house. To us, it was a lush and full land of green and brown magic where everything came to life and inanimate objects were left up to our imagination. Paul and I would play until dark and then come inside to make origami or paint in his mom’s art studio. I loved Paul Bennett’s house and I will always remember the joy we both shared pretending to be Indiana Jones.

The new movie is out soon and I’m really excited! I suppose we never really grow out of our imaginations; my playground just looks different today than it did twenty plus years ago.

Post #401

Filed under: Stuff — Ryan Conrad at 1:36 pm on Friday, May 9, 2008

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Yes, over 400 posts; Now that’s a lot of hot air coming from Ryan…

In honor of all of this hot air and the meaning that readers might put to my words, I offer this post on applying meaning:

I suppose when one writes, many meanings follow. The one the writer really has (assuming that’s knowable), the one he intends to have the audience hear, and the one the audience actually hears…but wait I think there are more.

Another meaning is applied after putting the words through the many filters that the audience members have and then the inevitable analyzation that occurs. Secondly the audience will always attempt to assume some hidden meaning from the author (assuming there is one) and one can’t forget the filter of the audience’s biases and preferences and the messages that they’ve received from others who they had to apply this process too.

Well crap, by the time the writing can get honestly interpreted (is that possible?), it’s been given twenty meanings. Why would anyone ever write? Maybe I should start asking that question more frequently. And like right now; you are certainly (most of you) not interpreting my writing but my feelings and what has caused me to write this. You could come up with lots of different things. Maybe I just really wanted to make a statement and I was angry, or maybe I’m mad at someone…or maybe, just maybe, I thought about this little post while driving in my car on route 585 and wanted to write down my thoughts.

If you guessed the last one, you’re right! It’s hard in our day and age when everyone is a miniature Dr. Phil, not to intensely interpret others actions. Some of you are laughing right now cause you know me and you know that this might be a struggle of mine. Well, I think we all (myself definitely included) need to be careful of not putting words, thoughts, and emotions into other people’s mouth’s, minds or hearts. I have learned over the last year especially that it is dangerous to apply meaning to things, especially in the context of religious beliefs; I’m not saying it’s not necessary at times, but wow, it has to be done very carefully and thoughtfully.

“An intellectual is someone whose mind watches itself.”
Albert Camus

Did you catch my test? If you did, this post was definitely for you. I really just wanted to share this very interesting quote…

Career Story

Filed under: Stuff — Ryan Conrad at 10:37 am on Wednesday, May 7, 2008

There are many reasons for this post, too many to name, but I’ll concede that the main reason is for understanding. Understanding among friends, family and other professionals whom I find myself constantly trying to explain my situation to and who understandably tilt their head sideways trying to put together the twists and turns of my rocky career path over the last five years. Please heed this warning: If you are bored already by this post or think this is a really conceded way for me to advertise myself then you probably should stop reading right now because I wouldn’t want you feeling that way and I wouldn’t want you to read this and totally miss the point of this really long post, that point again is to merely be understood. So, I imagine that if you are about to read this, you care and are really generous with your time; thank you so much:

It all started back in 1999 in a little office in the basement of one of the oldest buildings at Malone College. Little did I know that this dreadful meeting between a wayward but passionate college student and a opportunistic college professor starting a new program needing students, would spin for me a career path from hell. At that time, I was a very good student at Malone involved in many things including Varsity Track, Student Senate and involved in the chapel-music program. I had a very active social life and was already committed to a program at Stark State College to obtain my EMT license. From a very young age I had a keen interest in the medical field and I was always very curious about the way things worked especially the human body. I remember Todd Bowers having a significant influence on me as far as medicine and EMS were concerned and I enjoyed my days at Orr Pool being a lifeguard and doing the necessary CPR and First-Aid training involved in the certification process. I also remember Sandy Sprunger, now Orrville’s Guidance Counselor, inspiring me to teach Health. I loved health class in Jr. High and thought it was the most important class I took. I really enjoyed not only the important information I learned, but the way that Sandy taught the class, with interaction and much passion for the health of us as students.

Unfortunately, the result of this meeting at Malone was a decision to switch my major to a new program called Health Education which was highly touted by both Ken and Pam Hoalt, professors at Malone. This new major was very comprehensive which was advertised as one of its strengths. It combined biology, anatomy and physiology, epidemiology, environmental health classes, disease and disorder classes and health program implementation projects just to name a few and on top of that, involved a K-12 education track which any Malone College education major will tell you is a very comprehensive and time consuming process.(it took me and many other education majors five years to complete) Needless to say, I was very excited about this new career path which, I was told, would be the new way the school-systems in Ohio and elsewhere “had to go”. I was told that a license in health would turn out a job in this new and exciting field of Health Education. I didn’t know that what I had just been fed was someone’s individual hopes for the health education system in Ohio and not a reality by any means.

After that meeting in 1999, the next three years of schooling went by slowly. Education field experience after field experience came and went; I endured many education semester hours and on top of that, my health classes which included some tough science requirements that had me working hard to complete. I became a Resident Assistant and was again involved in campus life. I obtained a job at Samaritan Care in the summer of 1999 and began to work there periodically and during the summers to pay for my education at Malone. My education at Malone and my EMT job seemed to coincide as I was constantly in and out of hospitals working for Samaritan and learning many new things about health and wellness in the classroom at Malone. I thought I’d be in great shape with my experience, knowledge and skills that I had obtained as an EMT and College graduate in Health Education. I thought I’d get my chance that I’d always dreamed of to teach health in a school system.

Skip forward to graduation day and then to a decision to be a summer camp counselor and subsequently move to England for a bit to teach and get some life experience. Those experiences helped shape me as a young man and gave me, in my opinion, some much needed perspective and framework on which to place my life-experiences into. I thought I was gaining valuable experience and resume building material as a result of deciding to do something outside of the box.

Upon my return from England, I had the unique experience of teaching at Mt. Eaton Elementary School under Principal Rhoda Mast. I loved my experience there and was able to do several teaching experiences including a two week teaching experience in second grade. Talk about a stark contrast; I went from teaching all sorts of subjects in inter-city London, where the majority of my students were Muslim, to teaching Amish students from conservative Wayne County Ohio. What an experience!

From the time I returned from England in the spring-summer of 2002, until roughly 2005, I was involved in coaching football and track at John R Lea Middle School (Waynedale Jr High School). Early in 2002, I also did some substitute teaching in the high school and middle school as well.

In August of 2003, I was offered a position at Central Christian School as a 7,8 grade Health and Wellness teacher. I was excited that then principal Deb Friesen, recognized the need of middle school students to have a comprehensive program of health and physical education and joining those two entities in the classroom and on the athletic field or court, was really cool. I had the chance to come up with the new curriculum and design the structure of the course. The next two years would be very fun and rewarding as a middle school teacher as well as a much needed learning experience for me as a young educator. What I didn’t realize in those two years was the fact that my certification was not going to be recognized in any public school. Central was able to offer me that position because of its’ private school guidelines. To be sure, it wasn’t an issue with my teaching license; I was a licensed and highly qualified teacher. At issue was my concentration area (health). No public school district recognized just health as a sufficient major. But at this point (2003-05) I was being told by the Hoalt’s that I should keep applying to big districts, and I did. They told me repeatedly and with much assurance that the “State had to recognize this certification.” I believed them even though as I’ve come to find out only two “health only” positions were filled in the State of Ohio from 2002-2008. And on top of that, the Hoalt’s were having many issues with Malone’s current faculty and head of the Health and Human performance department, Barb Easlick.

In short, a storm had been raging and all the while, I’d been kept outside of the loop only listening to the one’s causing the storm. I just thought I could trust my advisors and even though I researched the certification at the State level, what I came back with matched what they were saying. The State did indeed change the standards to a dual licenser in both health and PE. So if one wants to teach health, one needs a license by the state to do it and if one wants to teach PE, they also needed a license to do it. But when I reported to my advisors that I couldn’t get an interview what was conveyed to me was that I wasn’t searching hard enough and I just didn’t find the right district yet. My advisors, especially Ken Hoalt, would get very animated and visibly upset when I would tell him what school districts were saying mainly that “we need you to have health and PE” They kept giving me updated letters of recommendation. Four or five updated letter to be sure. I really should’ve put all of this together but I just didn’t have the tools or understanding of the system. Again, I was speaking to the wrong people and I just thought I could trust my advisors. I thought Malone would never allow this kind of thing to happen; letting a student get caught in the middle of a faculty feud and ultimately withholding valuable information from someone who payed so much money for a degree that was non-usable. But they did. For more detailed State info, see the information and links below:

Requirements for Health Educators
Health educators in Ohio are required to hold the Multi-Age License in health valid for teaching health in all grades - Pre-kindergarten through 12th grade. Health educators must have a bachelor’s degree with a major in health education, and must pass the Praxis II Health Education Test per Administrative Code 3301-24-05 (1998).

Here is the link for the above information

Below is the Ohio Universities Website for teaching requirements of PE teachers. Again, in both cases a separate license in both Health k-12 and PE k-12 must be obtained and Praxis II passed for each:

Regardless of the college of the university from which you graduate, to achieve licensure through Ohio University to teach physical education, you must complete the following program and earn passing scores on the Praxis II exams. This program leads to a two-year provisional license in physical education allowing you to teach physical education in grades Pre-K–12.

Link for the above information

These are the new standards which I’ve come to find out are largely foreign to many principals, superintendents, educators and community members. They were even hard to dig up among the information out there on the web. What is very upsetting is the fact that Malone (the health and PE department as well as the education department) all knew this would never be a good system and that schools were never going to be able to afford to hire a health only or PE only person, but they allowed about five of us to graduate with only a health education degree.

Again and for clarification, after 2002 all health and PE teachers must have a separate license for health and PE (two licenses); those before 2002 are not dual certified (they only have a major and minor in health and PE, either order) It’s confusing and a largely mis-understood major. But, all schools, if they’re smart and understand the system, are requiring the double major so that both health and PE can be taught. O.K, maybe all but Southeast Local in Wayne County who to my knowledge just employed a PE only certified teacher.

So, you can guess the rest of the story probably. I find myself at Central teaching health and wellness which I really enjoyed but then the inevitable funding issue arises and I’m let go as a second year teacher at Central. Now, I struggle to find somewhere to work. I really desire to be a health and wellness teacher but I can’t get an interview anywhere; once someone finds out that I only have a Health Education degree the dialog ends or they ask questions like “I’ve never heard of health only”. So, I end up teaching at another private school for a year also teaching some health but mainly teaching Bible which I put a tremendous amount of time and energy into and then bounce back to Central (because I enjoy the school, and because they appreciate what I have to offer) to teach science. I enjoyed the year there and have always enjoyed my time at Central but was nervous about continuing to rack up teaching years at a private school where I knew didn’t have a long term career. Financially speaking, I would never be able to support a family at Central and I wouldn’t have had much of a retirement plan there either. It’s not a knock against Central, it’s just the reality of private education. The reality is, most career private educators are married to someone with a better job and better benefits. It’s as simple as that. Private education is a whole other ball of wax; I could probably write a book about it. Not a bad book just a book about the completely different dynamics of a private school as compared the issues facing our public schools.

So, I’m out of teaching not because I want to be but because I need to think about how many years I am accumulating and what I want to do as far as education is concerned. I have a bit of cooperation from Malone right now to go back and get the hours I need for my PE certification (that’s nice) but I’m worried about school districts’ understanding of the system. I’ve also started a Masters degree in counseling because I have to renew this bogus certification that I have right now in order to keep my teaching license. And once again, I pay more money to the University and they give me another slip of paper that someone in the real world can’t afford to pay for. It’s a bad system no two ways about it… For sure, I am enjoying working at Samaritan Care and I am grateful for a job right now. A few questions and comments in closing:

How does a guy with excellent skills and abilities slip through the education system cracks? I should be teaching middle school right now because I’m a damn good teacher.

How do the Hoalt’s sleep at night?

Do you know how hard it is to see teachers that graduated well after me get a great job in their field?

Ya, I’m wining a bit; I’m allowed to once in a while

But, it could be a heck of a lot worse and I am living in a land of plenty; I enjoy my job and I like where I live. All this just feels good to express and It’s freeing that I am able to get this off of my chest

How is our economy going to handle the bloating of the universities? (with any of their now 300 plus majors)

How can the Southeast Local School system deny someone a job that has put so much time and energy into their programs and kids?

Sorry to those of you who have suggested ministry as an option for me, I know you have good intentions. I guess I’m just not feeling that vibe. I think the definition of ministry is complicated let alone having that title as one’s livelihood. I’ve seen vocational ministry wreck too many friendships, and it definitely complicates the gospel. I suppose we should pay head pastors but anything after that, in my humble opinion, gets very messy. Our churches are too large and our priorities too messed up (I know many will disagree) I guess it’s where I’m at right now.

Added 5/15; my last statement has been circling my mind as of late. Although I agree with what I said, it might be a bit strong. But it is where I’m at right now. I see so much abuse of the term “Ministry” and so much garbage included with the gospel it’s nauseating. But this is certainly just my opinion and I understand the complexities that a statement like this brings.

Quote

Filed under: Stuff — Ryan Conrad at 10:01 pm on Saturday, May 3, 2008

“Addiction is when finding an answer becomes the drug”

Ryan C

That Feeling

Filed under: Stuff — Ryan Conrad at 2:10 pm on Friday, May 2, 2008

Do you know that feeling? Like the one you get going over a hill on the roller-coaster or the one you get when you are suddenly awakened in the middle of the night. That sudden rush or surge of heat; the one you get when you hear that your lover is seeing someone else; when the person you care about won’t speak with you; Do you know the burning feeling I’m talking about? The one that moves from deep in your chest to the end of your extremities and feels as though it escapes somewhere in between; that feeling of helplessness and nothingness yet fullness and aliveness all in the same moment of time; it’s a time when others’ words have little weight and solace is too heavy to take.

Ya, that’s what I’m feeling right now.

Free After 26 Years

Filed under: Stuff — Ryan Conrad at 11:35 am on Friday, May 2, 2008

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Wow; It’s a reminder that our justice system does make mistakes and sometimes I’m afraid the poorer one’s among us get slighted when it comes to representation. This story is one reason among many that I am against the death penalty. It’s been proven that we’ve put innocent men to death in this Country; we know that no justice system is always fair but if that’s the case then why shouldn’t we just do away with at least the chance of putting someone to death who has been wrongly convicted? I know this issue is much deeper and there are certainly many more reasons that I could list for being against putting someone to death. But the story below is yet another sharp reminder that our justice system is not without error.

CBS Story Man Free After 26 Years

I’m going to go out on a limb here but after reading this story, do you honestly think this would’ve happened to a middle class suburban white man? Again, we need to carefully consider many issues when it comes to justice in America and we are completely naive to think that race and poverty are not issues

Morgan Spurlock; at it again…

Filed under: Stuff — Ryan Conrad at 10:37 am on Wednesday, April 30, 2008

The guy who brought us “Super Size Me” has another film coming out. I’ve read some good reviews. Here’s a link to his newest quest to find Bin Laden. He’s also come out with a documentary on living in a poor neighborhood with limited money; it was a cool film. Although, I’m sure there might be a bit of bias in his projects, I think he’s captured some important themes in his film-making.

The Power of Music

Filed under: Stuff — Ryan Conrad at 11:04 am on Monday, April 28, 2008

Thoughts From Sunday:

U2, Slain Castle, energy, power, movement
Drawn into emotion as waves pass my ears
Totally enthralled in the experience
The message, adventure, longing
Liquid rolls down my blank face

Prophets speak to culture, musicians yell
Heightened senses, I listen because I’m not threatened
Speaking without speaking, saying without talking
A longing that cannot be explained only heard
Only heard in the fourth dimension of music
Cognition thwarted, tricked; catharsis achieved

In these moments, a thousand letters written, relationships mended, love felt

“Truly fertile Music, the only kind that will move us, that we shall truly appreciate, will be a Music conducive to Dream, which banishes all reason and analysis. One must not wish first to understand and then to feel. Art does not tolerate Reason.”

Albert Camus

Recent Events

Filed under: Stuff — Ryan Conrad at 2:29 pm on Wednesday, April 23, 2008


Grandpa’s incredible shot on #5


Speaking in Chapel at Central


Work

For more pics, you can visit my picasa web album below:

April 2008

Hey Central, Check this out!

Filed under: Stuff — Ryan Conrad at 6:49 am on Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Thanks Josh E for the link. I showed this in Chapel the other day. It’s really cool!

Dialog; Why Not?

Filed under: Politics — Ryan Conrad at 12:23 pm on Monday, April 21, 2008

Former president Jimmy Carter made a statement today that was interesting. I know there are certainly many differing opinions about his recent visit with Hamas, and it certainly raises the larger issue of foreign diplomacy, but I have to admit, I like the fact that someone is talking. I think talking and conversing (even if manipulation is used by the other side and even if a significant history of mis-trust exists) is better than not. At least in conversing the channel is open and not slammed shut. Click here to see the video.
I’ve always been a fan of Jimmy Carter. He knows he might be socially manipulated and twisted by the parties at odds, but decides to step in anyway. Isn’t that what Jesus did with the Jewish people and the Roman Government. He knew he would be mis-read, mis-understood, called a ridiculous “idealist;” but he did it anyway, knowing truly what the hearts and minds of humans contained. Really not trying to hold Jimmy Carter to the status of God incarnate, but you get my point. I just think we don’t have a whole heck of a lot to lose by talking. Why aren’t we talking? I’m glad someone is, even if it doesn’t “solve” the crisis.

A Great Movie

Filed under: Movies — Ryan Conrad at 4:59 pm on Saturday, April 19, 2008

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added, 4/21…wow after hearing about the reviews that this movie received, I’m very surprised. Sounds like not a lot of people liked it; I guess it just goes to show, people have different tastes I suppose. I found the movie patriotic because it really engaged the audience in an important dialog about what it means to serve our county. I walked away wondering if I’ve done enough to serve my county and what that service might look like. I guess I would disagree with many of the critics.

In my opinion, the must see movie of the year is “Lions for Lambs” directed by Robert Redford. Nothing short of magnificent; this story has so many dimensions and tackles the toughest political issues facing us today with a subtle twist of the heart. In a rare feat of film-making, Redford captures three separate , yet similar stories. If you think at all about the course of our Nation, it’s policies at home and abroad, you will enjoy this magnificently patriotic film.

Thoughts from the Grocery Store

Filed under: Stuff — Ryan Conrad at 2:56 pm on Thursday, April 17, 2008

Ah, the self-checkout. I’ve never been able to understand the weighing mechanism. By weighing mechanism, I mean the censor that detects the weight of your items purchased and placed in the bagging area (not weighing fruit and veg.)

Further explanation; when you use self-checkout this very clear lady voice walks you through the process of scanning your items, paying, and then taking your receipt. Here’s the issue; sometimes if you don’t place your items correctly in the bagging area, the lady says “unknown item in the bagging area,” or everyone’s dreaded phrase: “please wait for assistance,” which means that you will be standing in line for at least five minutes until the person who’s annoyed at you for buying that lightweight chapstick, punches in their worker code to clear the system.

If someone is honest enough to do the self checkout and scan their items (instead of walking out of the store with their stolen goods) why would they skip over an item? Better yet, even if they wanted to steal something, would weighing an item (to make sure it’s in the bagging area) really deter this type of activity? In my opinion, the issue of weighing your items at the self-checkout just defeats the whole point of a self-checkout which is to expedite the process of paying for your items. It’s never going to be a fault proof system, again, if someone wants to steal something (especially a small item) they would. A weighing system doesn’t do any good.

Other thoughts:

Why is the bar soap not with the deodorant?

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